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19 August 2011 / lipsmooth

Bugs are NG (no good)


Did I tell you I have a thing for bugs?

Sorry, I DON’T have a thing for bugs.

Because their eyes pop out of their heads, they have lots of creepy-crawlers legs, they don’t make cute noises, they don’t come in pink or polka dots.

And because I have one in my room now. Bigggg hugeeee and GREEN plak tu. In Bugs’ Life, they play the bad guys: grasshoppers.

That thing was resting comfortably on my teddy bear’s face just now, and some more I like to cuddle my bebear while sleeping. Bebear is so going to the dark store room. In Klang.

I asked Papa to help me get rid of that green hopper, he told me:

“buatlah sendiri. Tutup lampu bilik awak bukak pintu toilet and lampu toilet nanti dia pergila masuk situ. Awak belajar sains kan? Insects kan suka cahaya.”

“alaaa nanti Malyn nak mandi nak pergi kerja nanti dia halau masuk bilik kite balik aaa”

“buat jelahhh! Pergi pergi. Easy problem je kannn” and continues to recite the Quran.

I know he preferred my older sister over me. But thissss? This is unacceptable.

So I went back upstairs, went into my room ready to jump and run 40 km/h if I see any sign of THAT GREEN THING, took my 2 pillows n comforter and guling guling in my parents’ room. Ha padan muka dah tak ada privacy.

Ooooh did I tell you some time ago back in Melaka a cockroach crawled on my face while I was sleeping? Ahh happy moments. So what I did was:

1. Screamed.
2. Trashed all over my bed. That cockroach was flying through the air and landed on my Ikea heart-shaped pink carpet.
3. I sat on one corner of my bed, positively traumatised (macam baru lepas kena rogol kauuu)
4. Took one brave look at the cockroach, saw that that thing was not moving.
5. For extra precaution, I took the nearest heaviest thing I could find. A text book I borrowed from the library as a reference for my FYP project.
6. Threw the book (as high as possible) and made sure it landed directly on top of the cockroach.
7. Stepped, danced and jumped on the book.
8. Then I went back to sleep.

Muahahahahaha my proudest moment ever. The most barbaric way you could kill an insect.

I left the book there for more than a week. Didn’t take a peek on what’s underneath coz I know the cockroach’s greeny gooey gut was seeping through my new carpet, so might as well milk it.

So anyway, finally Papa got rid of the hopper. Thank you papa, you’re my hero.

To Mr Future Husband @ Azmir Ghani (not that you know this blog existed), you must be like Papa ok? If I scream, you must come quickly with a broom and get rid of the bug that is bugging me ok? Ok good.

Selamat berpuasa! And Selamat Hari Raya Aidil Fitri my friends! God knows when this blog will be updated next time. *jeling KKJ lain*

Don’t let the bed bugs bite! Berani gigit aaa aku cincang buat gulai kang. Cececey.

Much love,
Liyana Hadi

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3 Comments

Leave a Comment
  1. Anonymous / Aug 19 2011 11:16 am

    hahahahaha.terasa.semenjak dah ada fb group dgn twit neyh blog dilupakan.thanks lyana hadi for making my day :)

  2. nodee / Aug 22 2011 11:34 am

    Shieldtox, every girl’s bestfriend.

  3. mulan / Sep 4 2011 2:17 pm

    Gulai bug liyana hadi.. Hehehe

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